Get ready for a ghoulishly entertaining episode of Dadz R Podcast, where hosts Jimmy and Jesse navigate the aftermath of Halloween while serving up their unique blend of humor and parenting wisdom. From Halloween etiquette to candy conundrums and even a dose of teen slang, this episode promises laughs and insights galore.
The episode kicks off with Jimmy and Jesse sharing their Halloween disappointments, recounting tales of tricks and treats gone awry. From parents that resemble misshapen blobs smoking to teens stealing the candy bowls, they leave no spooky stone unturned.
Jesse takes the spotlight as he delves into Halloween etiquette, offering a humorous take on the do's and don'ts of the spookiest holiday of the year. Prepare for a dose of laughter as he dissects the unwritten rules of trick-or-treating and donating Halloween props.
Meanwhile, Jimmy can't resist fantasizing about indulging in frozen 3-Musketeers bars, reminding us all that the joy of Halloween isn't limited to the little ones. His daydreams about delectable frozen treats add a layer of mouth-watering humor to the episode.
When it comes to dealing with the pile of less-than-stellar Halloween candy their kids collected, Jimmy shares some fantastic Dad advice. His ingenious method for getting rid of the undesirable sweets is sure to leave you both impressed and amused.
Jesse takes a slightly more somber turn as he expresses his concern about Charlie Sheen's daughter and the poor life choices she's making and the passing of Matt Perry. This unexpected twist adds a touch of reflection to the episode, reminding us that parenting is never without its challenges.
The highlight of the episode is when Jimmy and Jesse dive into the world of teen slang. From "Cheugy" to "Mid" they share their interpretations and offer up a generous helping of dad-approved translations. The result is a hilarious exploration of generational communication.
As the episode winds down, Jimmy and Jesse provide some Dad advice on various topics, serving up their unique perspectives and insights on parenting. It's a perfect way to close out an episode that's equal parts entertaining and informative.
Don't miss the latest episode of Dadz R Podcast, where Jimmy and Jesse take you on a Halloween-themed journey filled with laughs, life lessons, and a little bit of spookiness. Whether you're a parent navigating the intricacies of Halloween or simply love a healthy dose of comedic camaraderie, this episode has something for everyone. Tune in and join the fun as they navigate the highs and lows of parenthood and life with their signature humor and charm!
If you've want a topic covered in the show, send us a line! dadzruspodcast@gmail.com or visit us on all your favorite social platforms.
Get ready for a ghoulishly entertaining episode of Dadz R Podcast, where hosts Jimmy and Jesse navigate the aftermath of Halloween while serving up their unique blend of humor and parenting wisdom. From Halloween etiquette to candy conundrums and even a dose of teen slang, this episode promises laughs and insights galore.
The episode kicks off with Jimmy and Jesse sharing their Halloween disappointments, recounting tales of tricks and treats gone awry. From parents that resemble misshapen blobs smoking to teens stealing the candy bowls, they leave no spooky stone unturned.
Jesse takes the spotlight as he delves into Halloween etiquette, offering a humorous take on the do's and don'ts of the spookiest holiday of the year. Prepare for a dose of laughter as he dissects the unwritten rules of trick-or-treating and donating Halloween props.
Meanwhile, Jimmy can't resist fantasizing about indulging in frozen 3-Musketeers bars, reminding us all that the joy of Halloween isn't limited to the little ones. His daydreams about delectable frozen treats add a layer of mouth-watering humor to the episode.
When it comes to dealing with the pile of less-than-stellar Halloween candy their kids collected, Jimmy shares some fantastic Dad advice. His ingenious method for getting rid of the undesirable sweets is sure to leave you both impressed and amused.
Jesse takes a slightly more somber turn as he expresses his concern about Charlie Sheen's daughter and the poor life choices she's making and the passing of Matt Perry. This unexpected twist adds a touch of reflection to the episode, reminding us that parenting is never without its challenges.
The highlight of the episode is when Jimmy and Jesse dive into the world of teen slang. From "Cheugy" to "Mid" they share their interpretations and offer up a generous helping of dad-approved translations. The result is a hilarious exploration of generational communication.
As the episode winds down, Jimmy and Jesse provide some Dad advice on various topics, serving up their unique perspectives and insights on parenting. It's a perfect way to close out an episode that's equal parts entertaining and informative.
Don't miss the latest episode of Dadz R Podcast, where Jimmy and Jesse take you on a Halloween-themed journey filled with laughs, life lessons, and a little bit of spookiness. Whether you're a parent navigating the intricacies of Halloween or simply love a healthy dose of comedic camaraderie, this episode has something for everyone. Tune in and join the fun as they navigate the highs and lows of parenthood and life with their signature humor and charm!
If you've want a topic covered in the show, send us a line! dadzruspodcast@gmail.com or visit us on all your favorite social platforms.
U1
0:10
Welcome to the Dadz Are Us podcast. This episode is not dry or dog water bro. Jimmy gets a little sus when eating three Musketeers, but totally not Cheugy. Also, do not call Jesse a boomer. Best advice for post Halloween is to regift the Tootsie Rolls full send. Here we go.
U2
0:31
Hello, welcome to Pillow Talk. Better known as dad are us. I'm Hardy Handshake. On the other side of the mic here is my friend fat salmon. Fatty, I got one question for you. Shoot.
U1
0:44
How your bajo you bajo could. 3s But
U3
0:50
how good are you about how
U1
0:52
good that part of a little bit. But how good?
U3
0:56
Spicy food last night.
U1
0:58
Oh,
U3
0:59
so I can't wait to talk about the backstory on that. Well.
U1
1:02
Was just going to give a little soul earlier this morning. How this came about was we went back to our old Facebook Messenger messages. Mine only went back to 2019. Jesse went back all the way to 2013. Enough about that. That's going to be a different show. But that's where that intro came from.
U3
1:24
Technically 2009 or not. Oh that's
U2
1:27
right. Yeah, man.
U3
1:30
Just 2013 was a holiday special thread message between us that's like, well, and you're right, we will save that one for for Christmas time for Christmas cheer. Look at that. You guys already know something you're getting for Christmas. Speaking of
U1
1:44
Christmas, it's on Christmas music.
U3
1:48
I'd start
U1
1:49
off.
U3
1:51
Well with the Christmas. I know you're into it. No,
U1
1:53
no, no, I'm not saying didn't. I always thought it was the middle of November. I didn't know it started the
U2
1:58
day November hit. Like I was
U1
2:01
driving this morning to go get
U2
2:02
some things. Well, right after Halloween, dude was just going to Advance Auto Parts and boom, there's Christmas. I'm like, what the hell? I didn't play it yet. I shut it off. It's it's a little early. I just took down. Halloween stuff yesterday. So
U3
2:17
yeah, that's only because there's no good Thanksgiving music. There's some out there. So we got to recap Halloween. And that's why I like to start off with a new bit. Lessons learned. What did we learn this week with Halloween? Do you want me to start or do you want to explain how your Halloween went?
U2
2:35
You know, mine will probably be a little bit shorter than yours, so I'll go ahead and start. You know what I've noticed? I noticed this year a lot of older kids were out compared to like, I'm talking like, wow, older. I had more older kids and younger kids.
U3
2:51
I, I can't even compare because you know how many trick or treaters I got hearty handshake, I got zero, I got zeros and heroes row. That's in Chicago. Halloween was but Biden cold but Biden cold. Yeah, it was he. It was cold day. So my wife said it was also a down year. Now I thought maybe it was a snow. I was in a snowstorm and thought maybe that would have kept. Really?
U1
3:14
Yeah. That much. Oh,
U3
3:16
yeah. You're stuck. Next day. Beautiful. Wow, a winter wonderland. But it was spooky. So the neighbor said, well, snow didn't stop the folks in Chicago four years ago, and I asked what day of the week Halloween was. Well, that was a Friday. So here we go. We got it's on a Tuesday, got a massive snowstorm. And the third thing is I want to say half my condo gated area. There is all old people. So ain't nobody trick or treating. What'd you
U2
3:46
do moving to a senior citizen complex and didn't know it?
U3
3:51
I'm not a young man myself, so everyone looks cool to me. But maybe it is.
U1
3:57
You know, you were just expecting to move in that place. And that place be like your current hometown and it's not your current hometown. I told you it's not normal. Yeah, it's fun, but it is not normal. You know, it's funny. So how are we? 2s I went down to my neighbor's house. He's, you know, pulled out his fire pit. I don't know how that started. How did it all start with people? Fire pits into the driveway. They, like, pass out candy, like everyone does it now. But how did that even
U2
4:29
start? Don't know. But. So
U3
4:32
5 or 6 years ago. I see it too. We we we do it. We don't do it any other
U2
4:36
way. Yeah. No, neither. But he had his house. I didn't pull mine out. So it's funny because
U3
4:42
seriously, I'm glad you didn't. There's a lot of kids around already. So what's funny though, is he's kind of like, I don't know. He's in everyone's business, you know? But we have lots of neighbors like
U2
4:57
that, right? So we have another neighbor. I don't think she likes me too much. Our kids play together, they play fine. They have fun. But. So I'm sitting at his house. Why
U3
5:08
not? What makes you. Why is. You
U2
5:10
don't know. I'll let you know here in a minute. You'll. You'll know by my story. So I'm sitting there and I'm sitting there with him. She comes about, she's
U1
5:17
like, hey, hi. And she looks directly at him and goes, hey, my auntie is over there. We got fire, we got drinks, and there's chicken and food. And she walks away and I look at him. I said, you know, that was intended just for you, right? Said, hey,
U2
5:32
it wasn't for me to go over and grab food. I said, I don't get it. And he goes, well, I'm not gonna like Jamie. So whatever.
U3
5:40
So that's the story. You didn't go over there again. How am I supposed to be able to tell from that story why she does or does not appreciate your neighbor? He doesn't. She
U2
5:50
doesn't like he was like, yeah, she taxes me. I don't even have her number. Have you asked it for?
U1
5:56
No. She
U3
5:58
may, as she married no more.
U2
6:02
They don't know. You know. Whatever. I'm not worried about it. I'm just. It was like, a little like
U3
6:09
you remind her of her ex-husband. That's what. That's what's going.
U2
6:13
Oh, you think? Man, he must have been a funny, good looking, well hung dude.
U3
6:23
I feel like I should respond to that, but since I've never seen your penis, I can't accurately make a decision or a judgment or ruling.
U2
6:32
Well, for the background is agreeing with me. He is shaking his head.
U3
6:38
Uh, man, I would, I would tell. Did you see any etiquette? So my wife, she said it was a downer, but plenty of kids, they didn't do the fire pit. They actually did the propane heaters set up in the garage. All the neighbors came out, set out the table, and then everybody took pictures with the Halloween props and stuff we have around. We had to get rid of some of these props. A lot of my neighbors got a little worried, thought I was moving or breaking up with them, or they were no longer invited to parties. So my poor wife's giving them all these, these, these tombstones, these props and are like, are we out? What's this? Is this breaking up? It wasn't. She just wants to do new stuff. So etiquette. She would tell me these things. Uh, well, some of the worst things I've seen. What's
U2
7:26
going to happen when they bring the tombstones back next year?
U3
7:29
I don't think they will. I think they're just going to decorate their own yard and keep it like a trophy. Like a traveling trophy. I
U2
7:37
doubt it, because me, I would I would bring it with me and put it back in a yard and then would accidentally forget it when I left.
U3
7:45
God, I can't even get through my story because now you just reminded me of some other tradition we got in this damn neighborhood. Sorry. When I moved into my house, we had a giant Medusa, a medusa placard or whatever
U1
7:59
big artwork right on the front of the house. And everybody called my house the Medusa House, which I thought was ridiculous. So my wife being the the great decorator she is, she goes, get rid of that crap. We started putting it. We started putting it on in people's yards randomly. And everybody, it was fun. We pass it around well, we got one crazy neighbor who loves it and refuses to give it away, and she's kept it in her house for two years. Anyways, let's get back. Yeah, some things we learned this week Halloween etiquette. There's good and bad. Do you know what the word etiquette is? It's French. Thought. I know what it means. Didn't know its origin. Guess that would have been a better question.
U3
8:45
Not Latin etiquette. Atik. All right, so have you. I guess you haven't spent a lot of time handing out candy. The sun will come up.
U2
8:55
Don't say this. For my first year and probably eight years. Nine
U1
8:58
years? Have you ever seen anyone come up to the door smoking a cigarette like a parent with a baby or little kid? No.
U2
9:06
This year there was none.
U3
9:09
Believe it or not, I saw it all the time in Arkansas. Not so much. It depends on the neighborhood. I'll leave it at that.
U1
9:16
Yeah. Bad etiquette.
U3
9:18
Nobody wants to smell your cigarette. It's weird. This ain't the 80s. You already talking about cigarettes?
U2
9:23
I did know the other ones saw a lot of people that weren't a part of this neighborhood. Came into our neighborhood, and they parked. The parking was very, like, horrible everywhere.
U3
9:35
All from my car. They're all from my condo association,
U1
9:39
many of them. But we like me and my neighbor, we're talking we're like, where did all these people come
U2
9:43
from? And they just parked everywhere. That's a
U3
9:46
that's just a sign of your affluence. You're in a affluent neighborhood. Well, I don't know about that unless they're. Well, I'm just saying maybe they're from worst neighborhoods. Maybe they're coming from, like, apartments and stuff. Where? Or the country don't know. Who knows? Yeah, I don't know. Maybe you're like the easy stop right off to a main thoroughfare. Hey, here we go. Let's hit. Let's hit these guys up for some some popcorn balls and Frito Frito lay
U2
10:12
chips. My son actually got a popcorn ball, but. But it wasn't homemade like a company actually makes
U3
10:18
them. Okay, that's that's a little more bearable. Did you go through his candy? Like bad etiquette to me is handed out. Charleston chews 1s a bit. Oh, honey. Werther's originals. Anything unwrapped like bulk. Wow. Here's some Skittles.
U2
10:34
After I'd tell you
U3
10:35
this, you're probably gonna be. Probably.
U2
10:38
So. This was the first year he. He went off and went to Halloween with his friends. So on Friday we had a trunk or treat. He got a shit ton of candy. Okay, so for Halloween, I'd dumped that candy out, and I took everything out that I didn't want him to have or I didn't like. And I put it in a bowl and I handed it
U3
11:01
out to the kids. Kids,
U1
11:04
look, daddy, daddy's
U3
11:07
amazing. So our last our last bit, our last section, you know, last topic because we're going to structure this, right. Eventually we're going to give our dad advice. And I feel like that is the inaugural piece of advice I want to give out. That is money.
U1
11:25
So mean. I'm talking, you know, Tootsie rolls, dumb dumb suckers dots. Whoa, whoa, now
U3
11:31
we have to talk. What
U2
11:33
is unacceptable on your part? Dots don't want. Those are good. I don't like them. If I'm eating something chewy like that, it's going to be a Sour Patch kid. All
U3
11:43
right? Nothing like Tootsie Roll
U2
11:44
two, huh? Well, here's my. Okay, so what's your take? Like, did you ever go through your kid's candy to see, you know, what they should keep and not keep? Or was that up to your wife?
U1
11:57
Uh,
U3
11:58
I would go through their candy to eat it, not to see what they would keep or not keep. Uh, trust me, my kid, there's a lot of candy he won't eat, and he would just leave. So. No, we didn't do all that. But that's again, that was the old Jesse you're talking and looking at. Not fat salmon anymore. Just salmon. So don't go through all that candy. Well, but now had a zero sugar cheater, so got a shit ton.
U2
12:24
The reason why I'm asking is because my rule of thumb when it comes to candy is anything that can be re wrapped, I usually throw away.
U3
12:33
Yeah, that's a holdover from the 80s with us. You know, for like 80. Roll all
U2
12:37
that you can. You can unwrap it. You could rewrap it. Tootsie roll, dumb dumb suckers, anything like that. Dude I usually throw out. But this year, just regift it.
U3
12:47
You bring up a good point. I will also save that up for her dad advice because you never know. People are creeps nowadays, right? They could have
U2
12:55
to grow up there, but I'm. Put it right back in the wrapper.
U3
13:00
I mean, you wouldn't know. I don't eat anything, right? Hey, and if it's not telling me if it
U1
13:07
smells, when in
U2
13:08
doubt, throw it out.
U3
13:10
I mean, it looks it looks like it looks like poop, but it tastes amazing. That's your tootsie roll
U2
13:16
so. Well, he gets he gets the Tootsie Pops, so he still gets a Tootsie Roll, but now he gets the, you know, the hard candy shell on top of it.
U3
13:25
Oh my gosh. Uh, some other things my wife noticed in the neighborhood. Going back to the ticket. 2s People bringing their pets up to their house. Like with the kids. But then the pets aren't really behaving. Nope. Haven't had that and everything. It's horrible. Dude, just leave your pet. Just leave your pets at home. The big one though. This is the big drama in my my town or as my sons call it, hometown. Hopefully I live in O'Fallon, but they call it O'Fallon.
U1
13:56
Hasn't hurt the population. It's no, not the third go to slogan, but up here in whole Fallon, we had a rash of kids stealing bowls, driving neighborhood and neighborhood. And it's amazing because all over their Facebook groups with the moms and stuff, they got the kid, they got his car. They kind of know who he is, where he lives, and he's got he's just it's amazing how many people put bowls of candy out. Like when I was a kid, I'd see maybe one every few years. This kid was rolling around with 18 different bowls. So my good friend, he had the ball. He would keep, he kept the bowl. And that's what no one cared that he stole all the candy.
U3
14:37
Everyone's upset that he kept the bowls, which is hilarious. So, you know, sharing your
U2
14:43
candy probably cost more than the bowl.
U1
14:46
You see the prices of those bags of candy? Holy shit. Okay, yes. Inflation man is insane. So candy is expensive again. I bought a bunch for no trick or treaters, but the other piece is the ladies out here putting out these super expensive bowls. I think because they want to look fancy, like, look at us, you know, and then are upset when they put a $30 bowl out there with Tootsie Rolls and then the bowl disappears. So to get to my story full circle, I live in a military community. A lot of professionals is probably why you didn't see a lot of Halloween pictures. And they don't want to be. You don't want to see a bunch of colonels and shit up on a hill plastered. The same with teachers, doctors, all that stuff. Oh, gotcha. Oh,
U3
15:37
put a pin on that one. We'll save that for the next section only fans. 1s So my good friend Colonel caught the guy, started chasing him down, screaming at him. He goes, I don't care about your candy. I want that bowl. And that's all everyone's going to talk about is how the colonel chased this kid down. The kid got scared and the kid tried to give him all 18 bullets. He goes, I don't want 18 balls. I just want my bowl. So everyone on these Facebook groups are like, you
U1
16:04
should have got all the bulls will come get them.
U3
16:06
And it's just thought, man, this is crap I've never seen, like when I was a kid. Anyways, that's my that's my Halloween recap. Weird as hell. Nate.
U2
16:15
Maybe we should have a new side hustle about gathering Halloween. Balls or or button track traction devices on
U3
16:26
them. Also, we can sell enter our garage sale, our yearly garage sale. Oh my God two funny. All right, that was a pretty good Halloween recap. What I've learned is there's really pretty etiquette. And your parents out there, you're not you're not raising your kids, right? Or the ceiling. All the bulls and don'ts and don't smoke near my house.
U1
16:46
And what I learned is, just because you don't like a piece of candy, other people do. What's
U3
16:53
your favorite candy? Three
U2
16:54
Musketeers. And what I do is I eat the chocolate off of the nugget, and then just you freeze it and then just eat it. Dude, dude, I don't know why they haven't just sold that nugget. That nugget is great.
U3
17:07
I just want to punch myself in the face right now, because I literally had the same conversation with you six months ago and we recorded it. Be sure to check episode four. Hey,
U2
17:18
hey, at least you know I'm not lying.
U3
17:20
No. So I'm
U2
17:22
not lying. What mountain of candy do you still have at the house? Like, what was your. What were you giving out?
U3
17:27
Okay. In whole. Fallon, 2s we have a lot. We are one of three houses in the neighborhood that hands out full size candy bars. Neighbors coming at me with that smoke, getting annoyed with me. But I am fortunate in life, and I feel like it's my duty to make every kid's Halloween magical. So I do it. So what's left over is Three Musketeers. I got about 40 full sized candy bars upstairs. Wow. And I'm thinking you're going to get a nice little gift package because I can't have this in my house. The thing. No, no kid wanted that. They grabbed every other full size candy bar. The only one left over. Three Musketeers. No kid wanted it. Wow. Splitting that dude because it was not
U2
18:14
you. Well, you need to know. You need to. You need to sit down and show him how to eat it the right way. And bet you that he will be all gone. Show them that. Take it out, eat the chocolate off around it, and then just eat them. Jimmy, if there's one thing, one thing in this world that a child does not need parenting or instruction on is how to eat candy. Are you kidding me? With this? Get out of town. You
U1
18:38
know what? Okay, 1s I want you to have them on the podcast and do it. And I'll grab it three months and we'll all do it. And I want to see their reaction. And I bet you they're like, oh my God, that is the best candy advice I've ever got. And if they're good at it, it
U2
18:58
won't even
U1
18:58
melt the butter. Why do you make eating candy sound like it's an old fashioned shit, man? All right, never mind. I'm.
U3
19:07
I'm moving on.
U2
19:08
Next. Uh, someone's got some built up frustration over there. It's, you know, because kind of
U1
19:16
second a ballgame. Second side hustle. Only
U2
19:19
fans.
U1
19:20
Chocolate. 1s I've
U3
19:22
got a bowl of candy I got. I took into my work that it will be there until January, because it's not like my wife or, you know, junior high school where kids will do anything for candy. Guess what? Jimmy Hardy handshake. In corporate world, nobody likes candy or doughnuts, so I'm stuck with candy. So I'm mailing you all this candy. All right, moving
U2
19:43
on. Well, before no more side hustles before, let me ask you that. How is my new setup look sound better? Look better.
U3
19:50
Uh, you look like Jimmy the Greek with, you know, like you're ready to take some sport bookie. I mean, the closet open in the background. You probably just closed. Had you
U1
20:01
coming. Are you fishing for compliments? Baby
U2
20:03
steps, baby. Slow down, Hardy baby. Listen,
U1
20:07
this is office
U3
20:08
slash kid's playroom, all right? I'm only in here to do this shit with you. Next time, I'll make sure that's closed. Our second episode that will be closed. And I'll even put up a piece of art in the back. 1s Like, I'm sorry to to to judge your your podcast studio slash playroom slash office slash. You didn't have enough furniture to use it as an extra bedroom. I don't know, I'm just talking shit because I got forced to come to my basement because, all right, now turns out, spoiler alert, it's Saturday here, and everybody just decided to do yard work, which is crazy to me. So it's not crazy. You know, thought
U2
20:48
like, I like this setup better than when you're upstairs. Oh,
U3
20:52
yeah. Yeah. Do compared to the condo, the condos just. Well,
U2
20:55
we've only done one condo, so I really can't, you know, go off of that. Okay. So let's we'll save that for our Wednesday conversation. So move it on okay. Next
U3
21:07
on. Yeah we done lessons learned Halloween recap
U1
21:10
check. Now this next part this is where I
U3
21:14
like to, uh, I'm gonna start something kind of new. And we're going to call this one
U1
21:20
keeping dad's up to date pop culture. What's new? Because it turns out a lot of my conversations with my neighborhood dad friends, they're always late to the game with certain stuff. That being said, there's things I'm late to the game or hear about weeks later. So it's good. It's a good balance. So want to I want to deliver some news, some updates. You can fill me in, give me your thoughts. And if this little kind of bit is stupid, uh, we'll stop doing it down the road. I'm just trying new shit. All right, man, I like to say we're going to call this. I heard a new line. Uh, this pop culture. Let's be positive, not calculated. I'm going to use that one for my kids. I just want that out there. So I'm sorry Hardy. We're going to be we're going to be positive about your podcast set up. Not calculated. Two Matthew Perry,
U3
22:15
everyone's least favorite friend 1s until he passed away at the age of 54. Now no one can say he's the least favorite.
U2
22:24
Where did you get that from?
U3
22:26
In my head, we rack and stacking and we. We judge everything. You and I, my we judge. Top ten cartoons. Top ten video games. Top ten songs. Why can't we judge who our favorite friends are from top to bottom? And you're going to tell me Matthew Perry
U2
22:43
is at the top. My mine was Ross. My least favorite is Ross. It wasn't. It wasn't Chandler.
U3
22:48
I think Ross is hilarious. The girls are top three for me. Well, duh, they're going to go with I'm going to go Joey, Ross and Chandler. Rest in peace man. So anyways, 54
U1
23:02
drowned in a hot tub and since he is a self-admitted, you know, substance abuser, tell her secrets there. Yeah.
U3
23:13
He's he's he's had his demons. Um, everyone's kind of
U1
23:17
stepping around,
U3
23:19
you know, tiptoeing around, like, I'm just seeing a 54 year old man isn't just going to pass out and drown himself. But there's other factors involved. Can I reference Whitney Houston? Do you think she just fell asleep and then just slipped in her bathtub? Now there's some substances there. Here's a thatth. Like, the saddest thing about this, because I do. I loved Matthew Perry. I loved his character. Um. God, such a great talent. He did. You know this? He never had kids. And he he's been out there saying he wouldn't mind. He wish he had kids. His dad, someone famous on Dateline. Not the catch a Predator, guys. Keith Morrison, who looks like Skeletor and he outlived. That was Matthew Perry's stepdad. So he come up. Yeah. Big family, no kids. And God, that just made me feel sad. Where
U2
24:13
does the estate go? Where does all that money go? Could you know how much he was getting a year just for reruns of friends? $20 million a year?
U3
24:23
That's. That's incredible. And
U2
24:25
that's just on reruns. That's just sitting in your hot tub enjoying yourself.
U3
24:29
I would say enjoying yourself. Well,
U2
24:31
I'm just saying that's what,
U1
24:33
hypothetically speaking, if you're making 20 million a year, that hot tub should have been filled with some escorts that bring you back to life. Uh, then you you that way. But that's not a life they sounded like he really wanted. No, he's talking about regrets and having kids. But speaking of which, when you talk about these residuals in this money, you know, this reminds me of Charlie Sheen. Like, do you think he's got to work even though he's, you know, probably hasn't done anything forever? And all the residuals he's getting, he
U3
25:06
popped up in my pop culture tidbits this week as well. Oh really? I always call Charlie Sheen the 12 year reigning father of the year. 1s He's got a daughter with Denise Richards. He owes Denise Richards millions of dollars in unpaid child support. He's one of those guys
U1
25:25
are. So guess where the daughter lives with him or with his mom? It's a 5050 shot. I swear to God, if that's your phone that's making this noise and you don't have it on silent, you son of a bitch, it is. Anyways, I will continue while you're deep in conversation with whoever it is texting you. Hopefully it's not emergency. Charlie
U3
25:47
Sheen's daughter Sammy. Guess what man? She started an early fans who it gets better.
U1
25:54
Are you even listening to me right now? Charlie Sheen's
U2
25:58
dad
U3
25:59
had text from my son. So sorry. 1s Unacceptable. We're doing a podcast about parenting and you're trying to parent while this is happening. I oh, so disappointing you anyways. I'm kidding.
U1
26:12
So Charlie Sheen's daughter Sammy just recently turned 19, and I can't believe it's been almost 20 years since he's hooked up with Denise Richards. That's how old we are. She
U3
26:25
started an only an old fans page
U1
26:29
and Charlie Sheen is livid. Knee jerk reaction says this can only go bad with the lifestyle Charlie Sheen has lived, and with him withholding money from the girls. Mom, how
U3
26:44
else do you think this would play out? And you know what's crazy?
U2
26:48
Uh, guess what? She lives with the mom because Charlie Sheen says if she lived with the dad, this would never happen. The mom, Denise Richards. Guess what? She started her
U3
26:59
only fans. I'm
U1
27:01
like, wow, Hollywood's
U3
27:03
ridiculous, man. So I
U1
27:04
lose a
U3
27:06
generational talent in Matthew Perry. You just wanted to do good and do right by the world. And Charlie Sheen's out here getting mad. Um, basically, you know, living with HIV, not paying his his ex child support about worried about his daughter not keeping it classy. Whatever, dude. All right, so that's my pop culture updates for the week. That's just to keep all the other dads in the loop in case he, you know, live in a vault under a rock in a black hole. I give him some news. All
U1
27:42
right? Sounds good. Didn't know that. Or how much? Well, wonder what Denise Richards is going to do, though on there. She's not like she's young anymore.
U3
27:52
Every. You just talked about making money eating chocolate.
U1
27:56
She can do that.
U3
27:59
You don't have to be young to do that. Maybe she can get on OnlyFans and give erotic parenting advice. Maybe,
U2
28:05
maybe, maybe she'll have us on as a special
U1
28:08
guest.
U3
28:10
The daddy, you know, bring that one back for you. Maybe. So you also talked about today. Some lingo. Yeah. Midsection. Next part. Let's talk about kid updates. Let's talk about our kids. And what kind of new lingo did we learn? Oh, I looked up a
U2
28:28
couple. I didn't know any of them, but my son doesn't use any of this yet, so maybe it's. You know what? I knew one, I knew one, and so I'll name off some of these when you name some of your. And we'll see if your kids are using it yet or not.
U3
28:46
I started off this week. I was at work and I said, I'm a proud spouse and reluctant parent, and people looked at me kind of funny. And I was wondering if you introduce yourself as I'm a proud parent, reluctant spouse. Anyways, so we start talking about words matter, right? Lingo. My kid keeps calling me dog water and he's a you're soon dry bro. Now his name's Brody, so he says bro a lot. I say bro to him because it's short for Brody. So me saying bro to him somehow is infected him or everything's bro. He goes, oh bro, it's so dog watered, so dry. I get a shout out to TikTok for telling me what that was about, specifically whiskey babies. Look them up with whiskey, be on TikTok. Hilarious. They reenact basically teenagers like that's so mid so dog water dry mid. Those are my three big ones. I'm going to go out there and teach these dads they mean bad.
U2
29:46
Now did any of those come on come with your talk with the neighborhood dads
U1
29:51
or no.
U3
29:53
So my neighborhood dads make fun of me, because I will inject these same words in our conversations and group text messages and they say I'm a wannabe. I'm like, no man, I got raised keeping it real. I don't know now
U2
30:08
with with my list. I just like got on Google and look, hey kid slang.
U3
30:13
So do you want me to guess what they mean? I probably know all these. I feel confident because my wife is a junior high teacher. She comes home and she goes, you want some smoke? I got new words. Did you? Okay,
U2
30:25
first one here. Clap back if you ever heard
U3
30:28
of that. Um. God, that's. I feel like that's pretty. That's like ten years old. Clapback, man. Yeah. Talk shit. Talk
U2
30:35
back. Oh, really? I've never say never come back. Never heard of that?
U1
30:40
Oh, no.
U2
30:40
Chug! Oh,
U3
30:42
chug! Can you spell it? Oh, well,
U2
30:46
actually, that's that's how
U1
30:47
I know. That's how I
U2
30:49
wrote it down. So I knew how to pronounce it the right way. Because the way it was written for. Right was like, what? And they said, this is how you shoot.
U3
30:57
I don't think I don't think you're saying it right. That's why I'm wondering if you know,
U1
31:02
not Gucci, you tell me,
U3
31:04
Gucci. I
U1
31:05
want to know what that means. They don't even know when you say that. Gucci. I'm like that.
U3
31:11
So I started saying that because my my son Taylor kept making fun of me, trying to use all the slang, and he just made that up. Keep the Gucci fam. So then I started saying it on every single TikTok and Instagram I did. Can you spell chug? Because I don't know this thing? Sure. Hold on, let me
U2
31:34
look at that. So can give you the because I haven't written
U3
31:38
that would have been
U2
31:40
because like,
U1
31:40
you know, because that's
U2
31:42
how they said let's see. All right. See
U3
31:45
wait. G8 e
U2
31:46
okay, g
U3
31:48
um. Oh, God. We're saying this wrong. Chug! It's it's. I want to say it's. It's bad. It's ugly. I don't know, you tell me, man, I don't know. I'm gonna ask my kids. This one. Oh, what?
U2
32:02
It means I'm cool.
U3
32:04
Uncool.
U1
32:04
Okay, okay, here you go. I'll buy that.
U3
32:07
No, cat, don't come at me with cap or no cap.
U2
32:11
Well, then I got. Okay, Boomer.
U1
32:13
So my
U2
32:15
son Taylor calls me a boomer, and I'm like, I want to punch you because you're an adult now, and you know damn well I wasn't conceived after World War two, like with Gen X. And don't take it away from me. Don't call him a millennial. He's Gen Z. God don't like his labels. That Boomer, that triggers me. That's another. Really. All right.
U1
32:34
Okay. Then I I'm
U3
32:36
I'm cool as hell. Mean don't be a boomer.
U2
32:38
It's gonna happen sooner or later. But can boomers make podcast? I mean, we don't do it well but make babies.
U1
32:46
Yeah, they
U3
32:48
they they can get great home loans and rates. I don't know if they can get a livable wage. Those boomers
U2
32:57
okay then got high key instead of low key. High
U3
33:00
key. Um, I've only used that. I've only seen that or heard that used in combination of other slang like he is high key main character energy so on point dope. You know, he's cool, but it's usually kind of a front loaded descriptor. Am I even close? I feel like I'm not. Just the opposite of low key is it's high key. So you want to be low like
U2
33:29
so. If you want high key, you want everyone to know
U3
33:32
boom. And that's why I say that they main character energy I will say. 1s You not bring main character energy to this thing? Lots of energy and my kids will come back and be like, you're bringing a Hufflepuff energy. You stop, stop, stop with the Hufflepuff. And that's like, again,
U1
33:51
that's probably the worst Harry Potter house. The fact
U3
33:53
that I know that's a Harry Potter house drives me crazy. Don't want to know these things that I have. I'm a source.
U2
33:59
I've heard of that.
U3
34:00
But he's it's he's he's a sinister suspect. Well, me just
U2
34:04
kind of when we were growing up, how many times would we have had to have use that word sus like, oh, my friend is suspicious, dude. I would have like, 1s really?
U3
34:17
We would have, we would have worked that into our vernacular like crazy. We would have said, hey, you see that guy over there? He says he's not trying to hook up with that girl. I think that's us because we, you know, we had Delmar stuff like, oh, he's a player. He, you know, like. I didn't. When I wanted a date, a girl was like, hey, you want to go? Go with me? It was like I lost my handle on English and said, do you want a date? Do you want to go out with me? I was like, want to go together? Like we just short shit up. Anyways, every generation got that.
U1
34:47
Then I got one myself, got one more which didn't even he.
U3
34:52
Oh yeah. Man. Gossip. Come on.
U1
34:53
Really? You know really.
U3
34:55
My wife and I say that to each other. Are we.
U1
34:58
Oh we're man we're we're
U3
34:59
we are wannabes, man. You.
U1
35:02
I hear that smoke. Well, I'd never
U2
35:05
even hear that
U3
35:06
smoke. That's because your your son goes to a private Catholic school. He is a Cabrini weenie baby where the public schools hit different, man,
U2
35:17
I guess.
U3
35:18
Okay. It's fun. I like that little section. Eventually we're going to run out of cool little, you know, kid lingo. Should learn from my kids. I mean, no,
U2
35:27
actually, I just I just took, like, the top ones. I seen them. We could probably do a whole damn episode out there, but the fact is, I didn't know 99% of those. Well, just knew us. Oh my
U3
35:38
gosh, that was it. You
U2
35:40
but me. Not. Not the whole list, but just the ones that I wrote down. And it's cold in
U1
35:45
this room. You going to make it? Oh, if I finally, I finally stop you to get talking about the weather and we don't make anything. Any comments about the weather now you're going to tell me it's cold in your room. Get the hell out of here with that. How
U3
35:56
was it? All right, let's move on to the next section.
U2
35:58
Well, okay. Now,
U3
36:00
I'll let you. I'll. This is where we're going to do our dad advice, because there's some listener out there be like, what did I tune into? And got to be fair, we don't have a lot of dedicated listeners. Right now we're sitting around 50. Not enough to go pander you for ad revenue or we'll start a Patreon. We're building or building a movement here, man. Single Diverse
U2
36:24
Mirror where we are ranked, and apples podcast.
U3
36:28
We only have three ratings. Only three people have rated us any stars out of I've got an Apple. We've got a good we've got 20 dedicated listeners that subscribe Spotify, we've got 18 Buzzsprout, which is the website that hosts this wonderful podcast. There's that kind of varies, usually around ten
U2
36:52
and that one, it's probably honestly harder to like get to versus Apple and Spotify and
U3
36:58
like I call it, it's for boomers bro. 1s Who's going to
U2
37:02
who's going to add the app bug Buzzsprout just to listen to us? I mean,
U1
37:07
no,
U3
37:08
it's no kidding. They probably listen to it on a browser that's essentially that's for. And here's the other thing. There's 40 platforms out there.
U1
37:16
That's why I hear these podcasters
U3
37:18
like, hey, listen on Apple or Spotify or your favorite platform because there's 40 and I'm not checking numbers, I don't care. That's much
U2
37:26
work. I'm working on getting a guest here. Like I'm trying to get like a Brutus Beefcake or Greg the Valentine Nicholas killed. Do watch. I'm gonna do. Mark my words, I will have one of those guys don't know how we're going to do it, because they won't be at my house. But maybe we can use three people on here. Yeah,
U1
37:46
let's say let's let's send
U3
37:48
a let's do a proof of concept. My my son Troy, he's actually working this weekend. He's in the Air National Guard. Thank you for your service, veterans day. That's coming up. Thank you. Yep, yep. So he if he wasn't working this weekend, I could send him a link and he'd tune in. Actually, might try tonight. You're working.
U2
38:08
Might be home. So if it doesn't go as planned, like I'm don't have to stay. Like I can leave pretty much when I leave or when I want to. So my plan is to leave here around five. And if by ten, because I'm not getting paid for this, I'm salary. So I get
U3
38:25
to keep my man dope, dude. I
U2
38:27
get, you know, keep my tips. But if 10:00 hits and I'm at like $30, I'm like, I'm out, I'm leaving. So, you know, which would only be really I mean, that's kind of late for you, but
U3
38:38
but yeah, dude, I hear you. So back to the like, I can send out a link. My dream would be to get all three of my sons on here, and we can interview all of them together now at your house. I'd love to interview Connor, but it's like you guys are on the same setup, right? My kids all have. They live different places and he has
U2
39:00
an iPhone, so he might be able to do it through his iPhone.
U3
39:03
Yep. You can. Perfect. All right man. So good dad advice. This is our our final, final chapter here before we take this home, because we do a, I'd like to say a horrible job of respecting our listeners time, and I don't care. I don't respect your time or structure. Apparently that's ADHD. It's a constant battle. You should be satisfied that. 2s We can get together regularly anyways. I heard this from a friend who talked about getting guests. I'd have some girl dads that are primed ready to tell me how much. How hard are their life is? Is it? We could
U2
39:46
do this, dad, wait. Like, have a couple guys that would are just, you know, actually, we could do one, like, could get Joe on here because he's married with three girls and then. Perfect. Then I could get another. Yeah. That is. Yes. That is divorced with a girl like he has, you know which
U1
40:05
which their, their all this other guy in Joe. Different worlds. So that goes to my dad advice. Say you're a girl dad. And and every girl dad wants here. You know sage parenting advice from boy dads don't know why not 1s learn learn how to do hair and makeup from YouTube is early as possible while they're young to where they won't care if you mess it up, they'll just. They'll be happy that you're you're taking an interest in making them look pretty. Um, I heard that several times over the last few days. Really good advice. Yeah. Another piece actually. This one's going to go out to you,
U3
40:49
especially after seeing the morning you're having. Hopefully this is the highlight. Hearty handshake Jimmy. Life is hard. And I don't want you to ignore self care. Now, it's not the self care you probably think of. It might be different mental whatnot. I got a good song recommendation for you know Darius Rucker is by. Yes. Okay. I hate when people call him Hootie.
U2
41:16
Yeah.
U1
41:17
Huh? You. 2s Don't start.
U3
41:22
Don't trigger me, Boomer. All right. Listen. Uh, he does a guest spot on with another musician, Dax. I listen to a lot of rap. Listen. Hip hop. That's just my my game. So Dax and Darius Rucker name a song to be a man. I'd play it right now, but, you know, with licensing rights and stuff ain't going to happen. 1s So hard as it gets. Be sure to take some time out for yourself. And I'll say that to all the dads out there. Don't be looking for 1s guess self care whatever from you know, a wife, kids, whatever. Take care of yourself first and you'll be able to take care of everyone else. That's my advice. Don't know if you can jump on that or tell me I'm full of shit,
U2
42:02
I don't care. No, I mean, it
U3
42:04
makes a lot. Results may vary. That results may
U2
42:06
vary, right? You got to throw that out there because, you know we don't need them. We don't need a
U3
42:11
lawsuit. Disclaimers, disclaimers. I like to throw y'all a dad joke. I tried this one this week at work and everyone guessed it. What are you doing? I dropped
U1
42:20
something.
U3
42:22
Oh, yeah, my kids got a crap ton of those. That's the new Beanie Babies. What are those things called, pops? Yep. Pop. There's, like, a whole whole second hand, like market, like Beanie Babies. Like, somehow there's value associated with with these dolls, and they collect them. Grown adults. I'm telling you, man, they're whole movement. All right, here's my dad joke. Jimmy, my good friend Jimmy, what are two things that you cannot eat for breakfast?
U2
42:51
It depends that I have a date the night before.
U1
42:54
I'm telling you, man, it's amazing you're still single. I don't know how this is happening. The answers are because these are dad jokes and not don't don't want you eating. I'm talking. Okay. The answer was lunch and dinner, but now you've ruined it because you sexualized everything. Oh, which reminds me, I don't know if you know this. I'm still waiting to hear back from Sammy's reps. You know, saying Charlie Sheen's daughter about sponsorship. The dads are us. Uh, she might think it's daddy's are us. Anyways, uh, want to do shout outs before you say goodbye? Um, loyal listener Amber. Amber on blue. Yeah, man,
U3
43:31
that she knows. Was that sexy Freddy? Uh, no no no no no no. Uh, Amber, 1s she she knows you as sparkle stash, by the way, when she's mentioned you. Yeah, but we're Big Mac. Hardy and Jake always count on her getting, you know, supporting us. So thank you. Thank you, Amber, we appreciate it. I may be related to her. I said
U2
43:55
that out there. Yeah. Setting up a GoFundMe. Me.
U1
44:00
And the second shout out, uh, haven't I haven't I haven't given this shout out for a while, man. Your mom um, I
U3
44:07
don't know if she's woo I, I honestly don't know if she still listens after I did season one, episode three. Do you remember that episode? I basically said childbirth is disgusting and it's not one of my all time favorite memories. No, if
U1
44:24
if she doesn't listen anymore, it's because of the hiatus we took. Like, we we had a little break there for a little bit because of our schedules and conflicts and. But I'm sure she'll hear that is. And mom, I love you and thanks for all that you do. Even you, even you, even you. Pop's
U3
44:43
awesome man. All right, man, anything you want to take us home with? No. I'm about to say keep it. Gucci or not, Chucky
U2
44:51
and don't forget, guys, if you like Christmas music, it's on right now. Love it.